Book Intro

BULLETPROOF MANHOOD The Three Pillars of a Godly Man

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 Act like men…  (1 Corinthians 16:13 CEV).

Men are like fine wine...After you pick them, you have to stomp on them and then keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with!

This is not a book written to beat up on men. 

I just think that joke was funny. 

Gentlemen, there are three simple rules to winning an argument with a woman. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

There, equal time.

If you are like me, you have experienced periods of wandering, searching for some traction. Perhaps your marriage is on the ropes. Perhaps, if you are younger, you may not have the men in your family who know how to give you a proper example of what it means to be a man. They may be just as clueless as you feel. 

Perhaps you have been crippled by a fear of rejection when you see a beautiful girl you would like to dance with, hang out with, or date, because you were probably…you know…rejected by one, at least once in your life. 

Perhaps you feel jealousy and maybe a little hatred when you see her hanging all over the cool, buff, muscular sports types. Your confidence is, well, just…gone! What do the cool guys have that you do not have? Be careful, the typical answers to that question are not likely to be the truth.

Masculinity has been under attack for a while. I think some of us miss our wild past, where we were free to express our base urges, where we at least had a brotherhood of like-minded party animals, and we could feel some connection to what it means to be a man having been taught by the music we listened to, and the movies we watched…even though we may now realize, that path likely leads to a very bad ending.

And remember your upbringing. Is there a father wound, a mother wound, verbal and physical abuse, a broken home, loss, or abandonment? Could these things be why you became incapacitated socially, depressed, angry, untrusting, divorced and alone, prone to substance abuse, overspending, abusive behavior, porn, one-night-stands, escapism, crime, prison, or thoughts of suicide?

Many of us men who are now Christian, realize we have somehow become a lesser version of our former selves. We have somehow come to believe that to be “Christlike”, we must be passive, de-energized, or we must bottle up our power. We are frustrated. We feel trapped in a virtual prison. We have anger, from old causes and from new ones. We keep it under guard…for a while that is, until the pressures of life, work, or marriage and fatherhood bring us to critical levels, and we eventually go nuclear and damage everybody we love. It is hopelessness and a lack of meaningful vision that compel us to just give up, and begin self-medicating. 

Is there a solution for that? Can we embrace the masculine urges that seem to be written into our DNA, without being pig-headed, chauvinistic, womanizing, rude, coarse, profane, drunken, combative, arrogant, or demonic…and still enjoy life?

To my surprise, it was the Bible that has given me the ability to be completely masculine! You may have already seen these Biblical passages, but they are organized and unpacked in this book in such a way that makes better sense, I believe. And the instructions in this book are actionable, teaching us how to respond specifically to our various environments and our perceived threats, with calm, cool confidence, and furthermore, be perceived as strong, brave, wise, and worthy of respect by those people who matter to us.

I used to be alienated from my wife, and I blamed her for our estranged situation. But why should I feel guilty if I did not even know how to respond to her in a way that was not destructive. Well, neither should you feel guilty.

Now…we are the honeymooners that we were for the first ten years of our marriage. We will never argue again! I made sure of that. And I did not have to make any demands for her to do something as a prerequisite to our restoration. Our home is a true sanctuary of peace again, and our children feel safer, confident we will not divorce. 

(Reality Check: Most children are deeply harmed by divorce, but not all marriages are salvageable!)

What about arguments and work place confrontations, I mean, when someone just unleashes their fury on you? I have begun to look forward to them. Their attack does not trigger me like before…if I am prepared. Where I used to have to deal with my own anger and violent reactions, now I can, with very little effort, remain calm. Or should I say “keep my cool”? 

I know exactly what to say, how to say it, and in the end, potentially make a new friend. And yes, I have done that on several occasions!

So what is so unique about “Bulletproof Manhood”? It provides you with tools that you will use every single day of your life. And not only does it correctly reset troubled marriages, it gives you tools that will help you surpass the best advice the world has to offer on;


various social environments, 



and alpha males, (you know, those cocky, arrogant men that were probably bullies in Grade School or High School.)

And you can manage it all with style.

It is not a compromise of your integrity, or your dignity, and there is no surrendering, and you will want to practice these principles, willingly, and not out of duty. 

When it comes to marital relationships, 

it is as close to a super power in real life as 

I have ever known.

Some of these principles are recent discoveries for me, though I have studied Christian doctrine and marriage principles for 37 years…and have myself been re-married since 1993. The principles in this book are 100% Biblical, but I have seen several of them being taught by other sources as well. The truth is not only accessible to the followers of God. Others also have discovered truth by observation of the created universe, and of human nature, and from personal experiences.

As a side note, because I have been this long term, shining example of a student of these kinds of teachings, it is very possible I may be unwittingly using principles belonging to other authors. If you discover anything in this book that originated with someone else, please let me know, and I will address it.

Though marriage takes up a healthy percentage of this book, I encourage singles to pay close attention, because you need to be prepared.

The path to successful marriage starts 

with the first encounter, 

and the first date

I must also mention here, that sometimes, it is just wise to calmly dismiss yourself from a situation until heads cool down, especially if there is any chance of physical harm. But the techniques and principles in this book are good for hot, non-physical situations, nevertheless. And it actually is what can prevent such extremes in most cases!

Jesus said that in this life we will have troubles…and masculine identity, marriage, family, and friendship have suffered the greatest casualties, in my opinion, and society has suffered for it. 

God created us for relationship.

Good relationships require properly defined manhood.


To Buy Book









Men are like fine wine.




School Dances, where fragile self-esteem    goes to die.




Party Animals of Animal House, the movie.





















"Hey Jean-Paul, guess who's back."



"Well, that argument went just a little too far!"




















"Now was that so hard?"